Vivian Probst – Author, Linguist and Business Consultant

Like most entrepreneurs, Vivian Probst is busy.  She consults for many clients on affordable housing, is a linguist with her WEnglish forms of English that works to remove the male dominance in the English language.  On top of all of that, she has written many books, some in both versions of English!
Also like most entrepreneurs, Vivian had some challenges.  For example, Vivian explains how she was making good money and spending it faster than it was coming in.  This, of course, brought some challenges that she has since overcome and learned how to help others overcome.
Listen as Vivian shares her entrepreneurial journey and details how she makes the time to share her gifts by writing and publishing her books, despite a busy career.

My name is James Kademan, entrepeneur,

author, speaker and helpful coach to small
business owners across the country.

And today I am excited because we have
Vivian Probst here in the studio.

Vivian is an author of a few books,
as well as taking on essentially

the English language, as well as, consulting
for, I want to say, low income.

But you get different phrase,
affordable housing.

There’s a lot of stuff going on.

So let’s welcome Vivian here.
Thank you so much.

It’s great to be with you again.
This is fun.

So I interviewed you a long time ago.

We were trying to figure
out when it’s been a while.


You let’s start out with the books
that you have going on.

OK, you have another one coming out.

You’ve already released one.

Can you just tell us about the process,

what the books are about
and you just take it for you?


This is a five volume series I’ve
been working on for 20 years.

And that either means, gee,
Vivian, what’s taking you so long?

Or I’ve been doing other
things which I have.

I’ve had this consulting business

and we work with affordable
housing all over the country.

It’s just a great program.

So I’m a national trainer to that.

So that keeps me busy.
All right.

This has woven itself into my life.

And it was just

20-20 was a year to celebrate the 100th
anniversary of women’s right to vote.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So my books, I decided that year
that this year they’re coming out.

They’re written.
All right.

They’re not edited.

I’ve got this one now is done.

And then I have the second one.

And I think your viewers will be able

to see the cover of that one
and three more to work on.

And I want them out this year.

So, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So are the books fiction or nonfiction?

Oh, they’re they’re fiction.

OK, they’re fiction except…All right.

That I wrote them,

each of them sort of showed up when
I was dealing with a life challenge.

For instance, book one.

The main character who is comes
across throughout all five, by the way,

there’s overlay of romance, there is
overlay of mystery. Ok. There overlays,

but the real reason I started writing is

because I was frustrated
by what I wasn’t accomplishing.

I mean, it sounds like, oh, Vivian,
you have your own company and oh,

my goodness, you’ve been doing
this all over the country and wow.

And but I had some real issues
to deal with just internally.

Well, yeah, internally.

And they showed up externally.
All right.


showed up because I was making a very,

very comfortable living, but I
couldn’t hold on to any of my money.

Oh, and, you know,
I’m willing to tell the world about

that because writing this story
fixed that problem for me.

Oh, all right.
Oh, it started out as a dream simply.

You know, sometimes

you just beg for an answer,
you know? And I was laying in bed one

night and I’m like, good grief, Vivian,
you’re making all this money

and look at your credit cards,
what’s going on here? So I just

I don’t know if I said it out loud or
what, but I kind of just said, OK,

whatever is going on here,
I want to know the answer.

All right.
So is this a.

Buying cars or fun stuff,
or was it just just, oh, whatever,

it’s going away or whatever
I could think of stuff.


and clothing, OK was a big
piece and furniture.

All right.
So stuff you couldn’t necessarily turn around. Jewelry.

I just felt like I had to exemplify

the best of everything,
no matter what it cost.

All right.

The need to look like I
had really arrived, OK?

It was an image that I
had I had put on myself.

All right.

So I go to bed this night and March 10th
of 2000, so you can see this precise.

Yeah, it is.

I wrote it down because the next
morning I woke up, I had a dream.


the dream is in this book,
but it’s only a piece of it.

All right.
And so

in the dream, I’m in a dungeon,
medieval dungeon.

I’m chained, which really.

So you can’t go shopping if
you’re chained in a dungeon.

So, yeah.
So so not a whole lot of online.


I decided not to use myself as
the character, so I created a character

who isn’t me, but she just had my major
issues and she’s in this dungeon.

And the first character that shows up

is the spirit of her financial woes.

Oh, and he tells her,
your issue is not with money,

you know.
So what was I going to do? I woke up

from that and I told my husband,
I have to know the rest of the story.

That’s helpful.

But it doesn’t get me where I want to go.
All right.


I’ve always wanted to write and I’ve
written for our industry,

but I’ve never really
tried to invent a story like this series.

So I did.

And OK,

if anyone here wants to see what

my writing life is like and that of lots
of other fiction writers,

the movie The Man Who Invented Christmas,
OK, it’s about Charles Dickens.

And how he wrote his stories.

And you see that the characters show up

and they talk and they
tell him what to write.

And if he refuses,
they get they get up and leave.

Oh, well, you know, I mean,

it’s a great depiction
of what it was like to write the series.

And so all I did was listen to what
was going on, listen to the characters

and life wrote the story.
All right.

Through me, I mean.

Stephen King

says stories pretty much right themselves,
right, and they do, especially fiction.

I love fiction because you can make up
anything and doesn’t have to be true.

Oh, totally.

You can just do whatever you want.

Mm hmm.

And so I finished that first
book in six weeks.

I was six weeks.

Well, that’s pretty cool.
See, it’s not a thick book,

but there were three characters
who show up their messengers.

They each have a message for my main
character, Avery, Victoria Spencer.

Oh, well, they have a message for her.

And I just went off in my mind
a little bit because

because when I name the character,
I had no idea that if you put those names

all together in a row,
you get a very victorious pen, sir.

I’m a linguist, I guess.

And I.

I love English and I love
working with English.

But anyway,

so she went on her her journey and she met
up with these characters

and got her issues resolved,
OK, which resolved my issues.

So it’s like watching a movie.

If you could put

money in a machine and tell the machine,
answer my questions or take care

of my issues in a story form,
you know, that’s fun.

Wouldn’t that just be it?

Mm hmm.
So that’s what happened to me.

So every time I went through
five challenges over.

Well, I’m sure I’m sure
there are more than that.

But there were five
that turned in big ones.


I had one lady say, OK, are you
done with all your issues now?

Are you.
No, no, no, no.

But those are the ones I’ve written about.

And so I think writing stories and making
them fiction is a really good way to get

through issues and not
get bogged down in them.

And that’s what happened to me.

So that’s why I wrote this first story.


the message to these characters
is just extraordinary.

I could not believe there is the this is

the next spirit is
the spirit of greatness.

Oh, sounds like a good one.
A great one.

Well, yeah.
Yes, yeah.


that really

impressed me because most of us I don’t
think think about there being greatness.

Oh totally.

Which is unfortunate.

Extremely unfortunate
because we are all gifted.

We are all.

I don’t even know what to say,

but we’re all for everyone’s unique skills
and perspectives, there’s value in that.

There is for all of us.

Most people aren’t willing or aren’t aware
or are comfortable in the complacency.

Well, and when I had that dream
and I wrote the first book, it was.

This is not just for you, Vivian.

Oh, yeah, I mean, this is for anyone.

Who has issues and wants to read a story
that might help them get through it?

And then the third character is the spirit
of abundant joy and incredible fun.

Now, when you’re in debt.

Yeah, when you’re in debt,
you’re not thinking about greatness.

Probably not so much.
Probably not thinking about abundant join.

Incredible fun because the burden

of carrying financial debt is
at this puts you in despair.

So this first volume isdissolving.

Her despair is the subtitle
because she’s in such despair.

Now, this this woman’s a bank president.

Oh, she is not me, but she

ok, she is so gifted with other
people’s money, all right.

That she can take care of their issues.

By the way,

the geographical location is Waukesha,
Wisconsin, because I’ve lived there for 40

years and I love the city and some of its
history and authenticity.

But so

the story takes place there.

And so that gave me a nice foundation.

But she’s so she’s president of a bank

in Waukesha in the 1970s
and she can work magic.

Oh, with real estate transactions,
with investing.

So, you know, the bank,

everybody flocks to the bank because
she’s so good at what she does.

But guess what about her own life?

She’s a mess.
All right.

She’s she’s on the verge
of bankruptcy and.

Well, who ever heard of a bank
president filing for.

Maybe they do.
I don’t know.

But in my story, in my story,

she doesn’t want that to happen
because that’ll ruin her.

So she’s the desperate one.

She’s the one that goes to bed and says

somebody’s got to do something about this.

I’m a I’m a reasonably intelligent person.

Why can’t I get over this?

And the reason she can’t get over it
is different than what my reason was.

But the message you see,

the message is still good for anyone
who’s struggling with financial issues.

No one that’s not about money.

All right.


think about who you are as a human being,

there is greatness inside of you
that wants to be released and expressed.

And if you’re withholding that,

that could be part of the reason
that you’re struggling like you are.

And number three, you’re not enjoying life

enough and you’re not
having enough fun, fair?

Arguable for just anyone.

Well, these are such universal concepts.

And yet, for me, they triggered

a turning point in my own
relationship with money.

And I just want to share all of these
with anyone who’s interested.

So they’re out, you know, two of them out.

So when you tell your husband
on March 10th, twenty two thousand.

You’re like, hey, I had this dream,

I’m going to get out of debt.

He wasn’t debt with you as well, right?
He wasn’t.

What was he was in financial
dire straits as well.

No, no, no, no, no.

I mean, it was a second
marriage for both of us.

We had five children, OK?

And so there were certainly issues.


no, I had my own issues, OK?

And we kept separate financial
identities because back in those days,

one spouse is ex could possibly come
after the other spouse’s funds.

And we just wanted
that to not be a problem.


So anyway,

we were we were doing OK, but I was
the one who couldn’t stop spending money.

I have every chance I got I was in a store
and you know, what I get now is

I didn’t I didn’t have the greatness
piece from inside, all right?

So I had to keep dressing up my life on
the outside, which is a good thing to do.

Well, sure.
Yeah, but if it.

If it is.

The only reason that you’re spending money

because you want to look a certain
way or be seen in a certain way,

your inner life isn’t able to
get to you with anything.

And that’s why, for me, money became this

burden that I had to understand
in order to get out out of debt burden.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, debt is a burden.


No money.

Thank you.
Thank you.

Thank you for the clarification.

Money is good.
It’s a good thing that not so good.


I suppose money in parentheses
is less than good

money written in black is.

Thank you.

Thank you.

So what made you decide to write a book

versus just journaling or
something of that nature.

Oh well this is really a good,
a good conversation.

Before I wrote these books,
I had read a book by Julia Cameron.

It’s called The Artist’s Way.

Oh, sure.

And I was looking for
a way to be artistic.

I want to be very frank.

I love what I do for my
consulting business.

But fundamentally, it’s teaching tax
regulations for hours at a time.

Sounds like a roller coaster.

Oh, listen.
But I love it.

All right.
All right.

And the reason I love it

is because I love teaching and I love it
when people understand what they’re doing.

And when you’re in a program that delivers

affordable housing around the country,
you’re doing good, you know?

So I loved it for all those reasons.

But it wasn’t what I wanted.

It wasn’t the only thing
I wanted to do in life.

It just kept me very busy.

So I read her book and she says,

you should write for 30
minutes every morning.

Just it doesn’t matter what you write,
you just write for 30 minutes every

morning because she says,
every one of us is an artist.

We are all artists.

And her way for you to find that is
to journal for 30 minutes every morning.

And so I started doing that faithfully.
All right.

All right.
And all of this everything that I’ve

written, published, whatever has come
from taking that time to go inside.

And it it doesn’t matter if it’s dramatic.

If it doesn’t, does it
matter if it’s boring?

It does.
Nothing matters except that you get it out

because she says
once you get the top layer off,

you get to who you really are,
you get to the real you are

and then watch what happens, because then
whatever you really yearn for in your

in your inner self, in your artistic life,
that starts to come forward.

So I just love it.

I just reading that and I was my kids were

getting older and so I could take
time in the morning to journal

while they were getting ready
for school and and things like that.

So I know a lot of people
say they don’t have time.

Oh they’re wrong.

Thank you so much.

Because time expands and contracts

according to what we
give our attention to.

It’s a quantum physics kind of thing.

Parkinson’s law.

Oh is that it?

Parkinson’s law says that an activity will
take the amount of time that you give it.

Oh yeah.

And so and you could argue there’s
there’s discipline, self-control in there

as well as far as writing down your
artistic stuff, working out,

spending time with your kids,
getting work done,

insert whatever you should be doing here
and you can make up excuses very easily.

Oh, yeah.

So there has to be a compelling reason

to go from gee, I had a dream
to oh I’m going to write,

I’m going to write a story
about that’s pretty big stuff.

It is at least to get a published.


by the way, publishing these days is
super easy.

I’m going to.

Oh challenge that a little bit.

Self publishing easy.

That’s said so I was going for a jog.
Let’s go.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.


the tools you have for self published.

You know how it is.
Extremely easy.


But it still has to be done
well and and that’s the point.

There has to be something that compels you

and it, I believe it has
to come from inside.

Oh yeah.

and that’s where I had to make a major

life transition because I grew up
with within a framework that said,

this is your life, this is what you
believe and this is what you will do.

And I ended up.

When I was twenty eight.

Mm hmm.

Realizing that I could not
live that way any longer.

I mean, we all go through crises in life

and at the age of twenty
eight, I said, no,

that’s not my life.

And I had to leave that way of life
in order to start my own stuff.

All right.
And and I think we all have to do that.

So the question is,
what drives you from inside?

What what gives you purpose and joy?

And I think to many of us, don’t go there.

Oh, it’s a great majority.

Yeah, yeah.

Just either they don’t know to ask

the question or they don’t believe
that they’re special in any way.


Or or maybe I guess that I’m
thinking about this.

Maybe they’re afraid of what the answer

may be or maybe they’re afraid
that they don’t know the answer.

It’s likefiguring that out.

My character goes through that.

In this book,

when she’s meeting the spirit of greatness
because she’s never heard of greatness,

she’s very good at what she does.

But her her life has never told her or
taught her that she’s worth anything.

Just doing what she’s good at because

because when she was a child,
she didn’t have

money and the kids at school teased her
and blah, blah, blah, blah, whatever.

But she just decided

I’m going to be a bank president
because then I will have money.

And so it was a purely external

purpose for her.

But that’s OK now.
Not really.

No, no, no.

It it’s not satisfying.

I can’t I can only speak for me.

I can’t speak for the world.

But you get really tired of.

Doing things that aren’t satisfying or
getting stuck somewhere

or doing things because other people
told you this is your life, right?

This is what you should be doing.

And so I think there are junctures in life

where we all come to a place where we can
decide to do something different,

and that is to follow
what drives us inside.

Now, caution, please.

I’m not saying quit your day job and,
you know, walk the earth and come.

Yeah, well,

whatever works, right? I mean,
there are people who do that.

For me, it was just saying,
no, this is not my life.

I’m going to start living my life.

And that’s when all this great
stuff started happening.

But then so I have this great life,

this great business, and then I
get stuck spending too much money.

So that’s book one.
All right.

Got that done.

The next book, I became ill.

Traveling all over the country,

changing time zones.

My doctor finally said,
you’ve got circadian rhythm dysfunction

just from never knowing what time zone
I’m in and having to change time zones.

And, oh, my heartbeat got irregular.

And then I experienced
my first panic attack.

Oh, dear.

Anyone who’s ever had them,

you’re just sure you’re dying and it’s
the most awful feeling in the world.

So the doctor told me you’re

you’re just trying to do too much
and you’ve got to stop.

And I’m like, what?

I’m not going to stop,
but I love what I do.

So book two, I’m laying in bed.

They put me on bed rest and they’re

waiting for my heart and all my circadian
rhythms to get back in sync, so to speak.

And I just start writing her next book

in the hospital.
I’m at home.

They didn’t ever have to.

Yeah, but but while I’m laying there,
you know, if it worked for my money

issues, the thought was like, well,
maybe it’ll work for this issue.


Why do I.

Exhaust myself constantly.

I mean, I was I was so weary,

but when you have a small company
and you’re the leader and you’re

making money and that supports other
people, you get you can get into this

this rut.

I’ve got to keep doing this because
I’ve got other people depending on me.

And you can

get yourself sick.

You can get all messed up over that.

You know, it’s interesting you say
that because my I have a couple of stories

about my dad with his own business
where he ended up getting pretty sick.

But I tell people in my business planning

class that your health is priority one
and your business, if you’re not careful,

will sacrifice your health because you’ll
essentially build your own prison.

That’ll lead to overwhelming stress.

And then your body is going to pump
the brakes for you if you don’t pump them

on yourself, see, and like,
hey, you need blood infection

and it’s not a bladder infection because

of external whatever
and some bad gas station sushi or

something like, I guess your body
just pumping the brakes ready or not.

Yeah, I got a diagnosis of interstitial
cystitis, which is related.

OK, and so it all culminated in.

All right, why are you doing this.
Yeah, well, stop it.


So here comes volume two,
which releases June 1st.

All right.

And that is all about unworthiness.


Isn’t that interesting that I thought,
oh, why am I ill and so tired?


that story takes you on a journey

of not feeling like you have
the right to take care of yourself.

You don’t have the right to be yourself.

Oh, you.

I mean, it was such a deep journey,
it was much deeper than the first one.


and the character comes to a pinnacle.


on top of a mountain.

And she has to choose whether to stay

there, OK, which is she really
confronts her fear in volume one.

She doesn’t confront fear.

She’s really

taken aback by this concept of

I’ve lost my train of thought of greatness
and it scares her.

OK, and so so in book two,
she has to confront that fear.

All right.
Which she does.

So underneath everything is this
sense that I don’t I don’t deserve.

And that plays out in Book two till she

comes to this pinnacle
and she has to decide,

am I going to stay on this
narrow precipice where I have to try

to balance for the rest of my life,
or am I going to freefall in.

Oh, yeah.

Choices of choice.
Oh, yeah.

Well, it’s fiction.

Surely the worst thing
you can say is I had no choice.

Like, I feel like there’s
always an option three.

There is.
There is.

In her case, I gave her only two
because I’d still be writing.

This isn’t war and peace.

OK, so she freefalls OK
into presents, all right.

She wakes up in a wonderful world because

she let go of holding on to her
fear and letting fear stop her.

So she chose Free-Fall.

She and she freefalls into freedom, OK?

And all kinds of magical
things happen now.

There’s a man involved and there’s horse.

You know, there’s there’s all.

Kinds of things going on, but that’s book,
too, and that’s coming out June 1st.

All right.
And I had to deal with that because

you cannot tap into your greatness
if you think you’re worthless.

It’s I mean, I suppose it’s
the polar opposites, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And that’s what was happening
in my business life.

People were enjoying what I was doing.

They were paying me well.

And yet there was this
sense of unworthiness.

I would get up and teach and I get done.

And then I would just criticize myself.
Oh yeah.

I mean, it was a horrible way to live.

So this illness, the second book
brought me into, you know what?

That’s got to stop smart.

You know, we’ve told you
there’s greatness in you.

There’s greatness in everyone.

Now, you have to own that.

You’re worthy.
You are.

You’re worthy of.

Of the freedom to live the life
that you want to live.


another thing is that that can
be a slow change.

I’m still in my consulting business,
right? I still have that.

And and I have my books, you know, so

that you can blend life will
let you blend if you will.

Let yourself give yourself
permission to do it right.

I suppose it’s prioritizing
the priorities, right?

And making sure you’re right up there.

Mm hmm.


For sure.

Because that’s a that’s hard.

Mm hmm.

I see it all the time.

I really do.


I had an encounter that
taught me that, all right.

I just realized I didn’t realize ever

that I was being hard on myself, that I
was too judgmental of everything I did.

I did not realize that.

Oh, until.

Until I came to a crisis point
in my marriage, now this marriage, No.

One or two, two, two, I had to leave No.

One, because my belief
system just took me out.

There’s no way to stay in that.

OK, my second marriage was
and is a fabulous marriage.

OK, but if you go into a second marriage
with this unworthiness,

you can marry the most wonderful person
and you won’t be able to take it right.

You won’t you will talk yourself out
of it because you don’t deserve it.

So believe you don’t deserve you.
Thank you very much.

So I wrote my memoir,
which we’re not really talking about

today, but I life told me
I mean, not in words, but.

That you know what,

yeah, your husband could treat you better,

but you

could treat you better.

So from now on, Vivian,
when you look at your husband and you say

you’re not treating me right, I’m leaving
my my book is called I was a yo yo wife

because I kept leaving because it
was always my husband’s fault.

But when when I got that message
that it’s how I treat myself.

That needed the attention,

and so it was just another step on this
journey, this worthiness,

my marriage transformed and worthiness
to me is the most important thing

that each of us must decide whether
we’re going to accept that gift or not.

And our society just.

Doesn’t teach that no,
it doesn’t show us how to argue that they

cater to the weak because
the weak will buy stuff.

Yes,go shopping.

So, I mean, in the the
is that retail therapy?

Yeah, yeah.

I would imagine that there’s some
psychological choices in advertising,

marketing, stuff like that,
where you want you a retailer or

someone selling whatever
stuff wants people to buy.


To boost themselves up
for whatever reason.

Not that anyone that buys stuff know

they’re doing it to fix depression
or something like that.

Well when you were talking there

initially, reasons financial data
strait’s because you kept buying stuff.


Probably a few companies
that are like, don’t fix that.


Here’s the difference

for me now.

If I go shopping,

I do it from a spirit of abundant,
abundant joy and incredible fun.

Mm hmm.
I am worthy.

Mm hmm.
I like this.

It would be fun to have it.

I always check through to make sure.

Is it affordable.

My, my, my, my definition.

But giving yourself permission to purchase
or use money from that spirit

is completely different
and different mindset.

I got to have this because I’ll
look better or whatever, you know.

So or my house will look better and people
will think

better of me because I’m fitting this this
image that I want people to have of me.

It would be a purchase by you for them.

And in turn, that would make you
happy versus just a purchase for you.


Bypass that middleman.

I met a woman.


So Book two was extremely important
because I couldn’t get to greatness.

Until I got through unworthiness

and now there are there are three
more volumes after these two.

So are these problems to come or these
problems that are already happening?

All of them are written OK.

And I did have that 20 years.

So, you know, I’m all right.

Yeah, I took my time.

I mean, five problems in 20
years is one every four.

You know, it’s the ones
that I got the stories on.

You know, I have this employee.

He was younger kid.

Twenty three.

Twenty two or something like that.

He was preparing to get married.

I think you’re getting married
in a year or something like that.

He was the one that was
planning the wedding.

He had some health issues which he wanted

to elaborate on and I didn’t
want to listen to because

one, I don’t think I can
from legal standpoint.

And two, it’s really none of my business.

So anyways,

we had this conversation because he was

not doing so hot at work
and he started using these excuses.

I’m preparing for my wedding.

I got this little heart thing that has

literally nothing to do with me
doing the job, but it just excuses.

And I asked him, so in a year
you’ll be married.

In six months you had
some surgery going on.

So after you got the surgery to take care
of your health stuff and you’re married,

do you believe that you
will have no more problems?

All right.

You know, and I was asking it.

That’s something he’s like,
yeah, I’ll be done with problems.

And I’m like, you know,

I’m like, no, you will
always have a problem.

And if you don’t have a problem,
you’ll make up a problem.


You’ll be the one calling and complaining
that the receipt is too long at the store

or something like that because you don’t
have anything else to complain about.

And as we get older,

those complaints get more vocal.

If we haven’t if we haven’t

given ourselves permission to really
live life the way we want to live,

I I’ve watched this happen in older people

and I don’t want to stereotype.

But if you are not happy
with the life you’ve lived, well, I.

I just see anger and bitterness and.

Yeah, so I I’m working on me

and we get those challenges because we’re

supposed to work through our stuff,
so we want a better life.

Yeah, so those are gifts.

They really are.

And that’s hard to grasp when you’re
going through your challenges.

But if you get that on the other side or
right where you’re going through it,

you’re going to get a gem,
you’re going to get something that’s just

going to make all the difference
in the world to you.

That’s that’s what those are really about.

I have a quote

in my workout room

from Arnold Schwarzenegger,
and I forget it word for word.

But essentially the the premise
is this pain is your privilege.

So no one else gets to feel that pain.

This is all you.

But it’s a growth.
It is.

Work with it.
Let it talk to you.

It’s got a message.

And once you get the message well
and apply the message right.

The other side, it is relief
and more authenticity.


It’s interesting.

It would be a.

It’s interesting when you think, what if
the world doesn’t even see a neighborhood

thought in this way or Haiti,
dare I say, evolved

to experience that or to believe that,
what could they do as a group?

And I’m a linguist,

so I take the word evolve and I realize
that you can spell love with evolved.

Oh, OK.
I think that love

and evolving go hand in hand.

All right.

Yeah, I well, I love
what we can learn with our words.

But back to your point.


Yeah, we can change.

The world, we can change our experience

of the world
as we go in and learn how to enjoy our

lives, there is nothing like
being with happy people, right?

There aren’t enough of them
in the world but got to like it.

And you get the sense that there are

to use that word again,
they’re real, they’re authentic.

They’re living their life.

And it doesn’t matter

that you might see things differently and
they’re not rude about it,

but they’re just so full of enthusiasm
that, you know, oh, it’s a magical.

Way to live.

It’s probably to some point learned
because they’ve learned that like it’s

certainly something that I’ve
learned when I walk into a party.

I don’t know anyone.

I’d rather not just sit
in the corner and watch people.

I’d rather go and meet people.

And some people you meet, you

don’t need to chat with you that long and
other people you meet, you’re like, whoa.

Life changing.

Yeah, absolutely.

I just think life is magical.

I’ve the older I get the more magic I see.

Oh, nine.

We just recently moved, OK?

We had a big house
and land that had to be mowed.

Oh, a big barn.

And my husband is done with that,
you know, and we just decided to move.

So we went from three acres in a barn

and a long driveway and all the snow toys
that eventually aren’t fun toys anymore.

Work once we went to three quarters

of an acre in a neighborhood
with a short driveway.

But the house is still big enough
for us and it was absolutely magical.

You know, we put our house on the market.

The second or third family
that looked at it made us an offer.

We turn around because we got to find

a place to live and we find
the perfect place for us to move over.

And it all happened within six weeks.

We were loaded, packed and moved.

So that’s impressive alone.

Isn’t that a fun way to live? Yes.

And all I’m saying is
you’ve got to believe your way there.

You’ve got to and you’ve
got to love your way there.

In in my memoir, I,
I say there’s one door.

There’s one door
you must we must go through, OK?

Live the life we want to live.

OK, and that’s a door.
A door.

We must adore ourselves.
Got it.

You must fall in love with the real
person that you really are.

You must adore.

And that is not prideful.

That is being who you are with, with no
excuses and letting your light shine.


Interesting light shine.

You raise an interesting point about
the humbleness that maybe people are

afraid of or afraid to seem
to eccentric or too

narcissistic sports or selfish.

Mm hmm.

You know,

it’s such a misconception
because the more you

are expressing your true self,

the more generous, the more expansive,
the more life opens up to you.

So it’s just the opposite
of what we’re afraid of.

Yeah, I take time for myself.

Mm hmm.

Something bad is going to happen.

That’s I mean, I lived
that life for a very long time.

OK, that was I believe
that was and I was raised OK.

Very much that way.

Oh, you don’t.

Your life is already determined for you.

Don’t even think about what you
want because that’s wrong, because this

is the way so it was kind of a
cultish kind of interest.

OK, yeah, but the point and the point is
in in reality is just the opposite.


Whatever you believe that.


what’s in your heart,

you, if you will, have the courage
to take a step, you’ll find out that it’s

wrong in the world is just
an awesome place to live.

It is.
It’s I just love it.


Three more books to come
out yet this year.

That’s cool.
Yeah, that’s impressive.

Well, as I said, they’re all written.

And listen, I have a team.

Oh, I have a team that
everybody knows their job.

And so since the stories are essentially
written in regular English,

I can do the conversion to my gender
inclusive form of English

while everybody else is editing and
putting the rest of the story together.


I want to touch really
quick on the English.


Did I say that we English
or wingless English?

What’s important is that we making English
an inclusive language for all genders.

We English.
OK, yeah.

How do you get an editor to edit
we English.

You hire them yourself.

OK, and you must have to train them.

Oh because I’m a trained eventually

there’s again I for that I suppose the
reading it the brain for that actually.

I’ve done most of the conversion

into English, now
I have the woman whose name is also

on the cover and Wandera, yeah,
she also she’s worked with me for ten

years so she can take a book
in English and convert it to English.

Oh, wow.
And it’s not hard to do.

There’s just a few word changes.

But what it does is it gives.

People better words to choose and use

because English has thirty nine
thousand words that include man

and no words

that give women.
Words of their own.

OK, so all I’ve done is create a few words
that are spelled linguistically the way

they’re pronounced, and I just
I’m experimenting with how

women feel would be spelled
w I am I n e OK, we English,

just a few words of their own
and I see a spark,

I see a spark kind of developing where
we’ve never thought of that.

We’ve never thought that the words we use
are so male dominant.

And yet there is science behind this that,

that I’ve done research

that says that there is a subliminal

undercurrent to have a language
that’s so full of man words.

There’s a subliminal indifference
toward women.

That language creates and if we just

change our language a little bit,
it frees women up.

And so I’m experimenting with that

by printing my books both in regular
English and this gender inclusive.

And I want to test it

because there’s there’s some science
that makes it sound like I mean, why not?

Sure, you know.
Yeah, why not?

I like it.

So you also have your consulting business.

Full time gig.

Oh, let me tell you,
it has always been my primary.

OK, breadwinning and and I love it.

I have a partner now,
and this is just another one of those

magical things that just
hasher business partner.


Because thank you.

That need to be clarified, doesn’t it.

Well I have a condo

and I’ve been looking for a partner

for years and years and I’ve
tried several different ones.

They failed.
Oh it’s tough.

Oh it is an expensive.
Can we just say.

Well any business mistake.

Yeah, yeah.

just a year and a half ago.

Something prompted me to put
an ad on Zipp recruiter.

Oh, I know what it was.

My two key people had
found different jobs.

Oh, for excellent reasons.
Excellent reasons.

One could make a lot more money
and the other one

had an issue and had
to move to be with family.

So but I’m left with without two
people that I trusted with so much.

And so I just said, OK, life, OK,

man, whatever you want, I’m in.

So I put an ad on zip recruiter
for a business partner.

Yeah, well, I just for for my business,

I didn’t I didn’t put
the partnership aspect in.

I just told them what their
skill set needed to be.

So you essentially portrayed it as needing

an employee? Yep. Was the goal
then to find a business partner?

Oh, absolutely.
That is bold.

And believe it or not.

A woman replied

that I knew, oh,

I hadn’t talked to her in years,

but she replied and she had
the most complimentary skill set

to my skill set that I told her
right during the interview.

I said, this is about partnership.

And if you’re not interested,
I’m not interested.

And in the partnership.


She came to the interview
looking for a job.

And you’re like my old lady.

And it’s it’s a year and a half now.


it was meant to be it’s just
another one of those things.

And so far so good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You’re in a have it’s a long
ways into a partnership.

So it is a lot of them don’t
make it to that point.


How does she react when you said that.

She said, I’m in.

Oh, yeah, she

she knew me, OK?


I think she liked me.

OK, well, and she like she likes
she liked what I stood for because

whenever I teach,
I might be teaching tax regulations,

but I’m really saying, oh,
you are so important to life.

You make such a difference to life.

And now let’s talk about
how to qualify a household.

But don’t forget that every
day you’re making such.

So that’s

the message I took out into this
tax advantaged culture.

And and she liked that a lot.

So we were in tune on that level.

And that’s the level I think you got
to be in tune philosophically, right.

In order for a partnership to work,

you might know things, but if you don’t
think it’s right, it doesn’t work.

Well, it’s just horrible.
Mm hmm.


So once you found her, did you then
look for additional employees or.

Found them.


Nice train rolling.

And so

I have

specific tasks I do for the name
of the company is Theo Pro.

Ok. T-H-E-O-P-R-O

and my train of thought
just went off track.

Employees and.


But its focus

is training.

OK, training people who work in this
industry, how to do their jobs.

All right.

And so it’s very technical
and you got to have fun.

And that’s my strong suit
is having fun teaching.

And so I have one more big
project to do for Theo Pro.

And then I can teach when I want to.

I can write when I want to.

I’m old enough.

I’m old enough to be more than retired.
All right.

I’m I’m past the age when
that’s OK to do that.

And so my husband’s retired.

I don’t know, James, you’re having fun.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, so I don’t know what’s next,

except I finish these books,
I make sure the approach is going strong

and steady and life will give me
my next assignment when it’s time.

All right.

Which I will joyfully accept because
that’s what I’ve learned to do.

Just say yes.

To what’s in your heart, OK?

Don’t say yes to everybody and everything,

right, just you got to say
yes to what’s in here.

I want to clarify something
a little bit with you.

So when you say.

You’re giving life essentially permission

to move you.

Or maybe I should ask this,

are you giving permission life to move you
or to guide you or to offer suggestions?

All of the above.

And it’s really your intuition.

It’s really your gut instinct.

If you

the biggest thing I’ve learned
to do in my life is listen.

Oh, all right.

Listen to what’s going on in here.

We don’t listen enough.

And I’ve learned

that that’s the most important thing to do
because everything about yourself and what

what your life is about and what you’re

going to find your deepest satisfaction
and sense of purpose is in listening

to what comes in to your imagination,
your psyche, you’re into whatever it is

and do it.
Just try it.

Yeah, that’s that’s it.

It’s just listening there.

That’s good advice.

Vivian, I know we’re pretty
much out of time here.

Where can people find your books,
I guess now and in the future.

Yeah, just type into any search engine.

Just type in The Woman
Who Forgot Who She Was.

And this is the Wenglish version.

OK, so it’s spelled differently.

And you can see it on the on the screen,
the two books in regular English.

You right next to him, you will find
the books in wee English or Wenglish.

If you’re interested in that version.

And I want to tell your
listeners that I am very open.


my email is

Easy enough.

And I want feedback, especially
on my Wenglish or wee English version.

Does it make a difference
to spell a few words differently?

It’s my it’s my thesis in life now.

Fair. Is to take that forward.

And you is it

for your website.

Well, thank you.
So very tricky, right.

Yeah, right.

Thank you so much for being on the show.
This is cool.

Oh thank you so much.

Oh, I feel like it’s impressive.

You got a lot going on yourself.

You solved some problems.

You run a great company,
you’re writing some books,

helping the world in the way that you can
and know that you do.

Plus your taking on the
English language, so.

And we there’s that.


we can all that’s
all of us have that gift.

All of us have it.

But we have to find it for ourselves.

Fair, shar your gift.

Yeah, yeah.
I like it.

Well thank you so much for listening.

We’re underwritten locally
by the Bank of Sun Prairie.

If you were listening to this or watching

this on the web, if you could do me a huge
favor, give a thumbs up, subscribe, share.

And of course, let your all your friends
know that Vivian has great books,

a great business, and you
can always reach out to her.

There’s not too many people
you can do that with.

No, even I try to call my accountant
for the past two days.

I can’t get a hold of him.
You’re right here.

And then you can you can get a hold
of some people, but you wish you hadn’t.

The worst. Well.

Thank you for joining us

on the Authentic Business Adventures
podcast, TV show radio program.

We do it all here.
Thank you for listening.

We’ll see you next week.
I want you to stay awesome.

And if you do nothing else,
enjoy your business.



Ready to Take Action with a Fast Business Coach for Your Small Business in Madison Wisconsin