Are you excited to get back to business? We’ve been shuttered and sheltered for so long that I fear that we have forgotten what it was like to enjoy doing things, such as getting a haircut.
This all stemmed from a recent email I received. You see, like almost everyone else not in political office or on TV, I desperately need a haircut. The email I received was from the place I have gone to get my haircut for over a decade.
The email said, basically, that they will be opening in a couple of days and that in order to do business as safely as possible, a few stipulations have been put into place. I read these stipulations in growing frustration. First, they no longer will allow walk-in traffic. No big deal, most people have to schedule appointments to get into this popular place anyways. Next, you’ll have to wash your hands when you come in and go out. No problem, clean hands are better hands, right? Of course, you’ll need to sign a waiver to keep the attorney’s well paid. Next, you’ll need to install an app of theirs in order to let them know when you are in the parking lot, so they can come and get you. Ummm, don’t we already have reliable phones to make a call, or send a text? Relying on some app to let you know I’m in the parking lot and ready for a pre-scheduled appointment seems like you are trying to open a vineyard when you just need to buy a bag of grapes.
The list continued on and included the whole mask thing and temperature scans, as well as limiting your talking while getting your hair washed. Limiting talking at a beauty parlor. Really? Actually, that part seemed nice to me.
Coincidentally, I am reading a book centered around the 50’s and it just hit the time of the McCarthy hearings and the Red Scare. The similarities between the fear from the people that were and are scared and the people scared to tell these people cowering in fear to get up and move on with their lives are striking.
After reading this email, two things came to my mind, “Man, this seems like a huge overreaction.” and “I guess I need to go for the Sammy Hagar look.”
However, I was torn. I love my haircut place. They were dealt a terrible hand in a moment and went from successful business to barely surviving because people were afraid of those commie germs. This business is just taking steps to appease the fear freaks and betting that people that live a more casual life will tolerate these extremes.
At a local auto parts store they had a spot you needed to stand that made you six feet away from the cashier. That worked great until I needed to pay and reach over to get my purchased items. We don’t have time for logic, we have commie germs to keep at bay!
As you can imagine, just about every business that deals with people will feel the need to go to some extremes in order to appease the fear freaks.
Plexiglass enclosures at restaurants, how quaint!
Temperature scans at every entrance, seems legit, you must be (almost) a doctor!
Masks needed at every store to make mouth breathers feel more welcome.
Let’s make body-condoms mandatory at every potential interaction for good measure.
And don’t forget our app!
I’m sorry, I cannot accept these criteria to do business. Many businesses suffered or closed because we took a hard left turn as a society with little information as the guide. Now we will continue that downward spike because we want to actually go places and do things but the little information keeps poking at us, with a blatant disregard for the results, by asking a never ending barrage of , “What if…?”
I can only hope that these extremes will go away, especially things like the lockdowns of bathrooms at public parks. You know, the only places available to actually wash your hands at a park.
To the fear freaks, I hope you find the courage to step away from your Netflix and your bathrobe, put on some pants and see the world again for all of its beauty. Just wear a mask as you order your fast food. You want to make sure you stay healthy, right?
To the more casual people that do not let fear rule their day, I hope you stay awesome and spend your money at the places that make it the easiest to do so. No app needed.